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Illusions_chan
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Interests: Art, Music, Literature, Anatomy, Human Psychology, Fashion.
Expertise: Song Writing, Story Telling, and Indian Culture.
Occupation: Student
Industry: Education/Research
Message: message me
Member Since:
3/30/2004
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| Modesty? What is it?
According to a dictionary, it's "1. the quality of being modest; freedom from vanity, boastfulness, etc. 2. regard for decency of behavior, speech, dress, etc. 3. simplicity, moderation."
You know what are the two things really irks me about modesty though?
The first is the so-called champions who scream horror at a little skin and bring out their pitchforks and fire, ready to crucify the "infidel" for being immodest.
Where is their sense of modesty, of regard for decency of behavior?
Truthfully, I'm sick and tired of both men and women bashing on other men and women, especially women, for being immodest.
I'm sorry but I find it to be a just-a-touch hypocritical to for them to be screaming at other about indecency when they don't seem to be showing any themselves.
Frankly, if a person chooses to be immodest, then guess what? That's their decision. It's their body, their life, their reputation on the line. Why should any of us stop them?
Yes, parents should stop their children, teach them proper values, etc, etc, etc. But guess what? That's parenting!
Parenting: [noun] "1. the rearing of children, 2. the methods, techniques, etc used or required in the rearing of children."
Does it state anywhere that it needs movements or activist groups to help it along?
Frankly, I'm sick of people jumping on these modesty campaigns and acting like they're actually doing something for us!
If you're so worried about what your child watches on tv or reads in a book, why don't you moderate their tv-watching or preview the books for them and see if you like them, if you're okay with your kids reading them?
When I was younger, my parents wouldn't let me watch certain movies or television shows. Nor would they let me read certain books. For instance, I had a teacher tell me in my first year of high school that I should read some of Salman Rushdie's work, because my style was similar to his. My mom asked me not to. She asked me to wait for a few more years because she felt that it was still too inappropiate for me to read as a young teen. She also asked that I talk it over with her when I do because she wanted to be able to explain some things that she didn't agree with. And I obeyed.
Personally, I believe that if you chose to become a parent, then you have the responsibility to be a parent to your child. You can't have a kid and then expect the rest of society to raise them for you!
So to all of you who think people should be more modest, and especially those of you who play the "for the sake of children and our society card", you need a reality check.
Man up and be a good parent to your kids yourself, and stop blaming others for "corrupting" your child. You should've taught them better.
The second thing that really irks me is the people who label an immodest woman as a slut, trashy, etc.
Does a short skirt imply that she spreads her legs for every man she meets?
Then why do school make uniforms with skirts that end at the knee? Why aren't those uniforms to the floor? After all, those girls shouldn't be sluts.
Does a low cut top imply that she is a whore? That she has no respect for herself?
Then why are aprons made with a 'v' in the middle? Why don't they fully cover the body as well so that her clothes remain clean?
Does a pair of heels immediately say that she's a hooker?
Then why are dancers required to wear them?Why don't they dance in flat?
Frankly, again, if she's being immodest, it's her life, her reputation, her body. You and I have no right to say anything to her. Her family does, her boyfriend/fiance/husband does, her friends do. But complete strangers? Hell no.
Modesty is in the eye of the beholder. If there is something you don't like, don't look. It's as easy as that. Let other people more their own decisions as to what is acceptable and what is not. And let them teach their own children. If they want help, they'll ask those they trust. Not the media.
Lastly, to anyone who thinks that a mother breastfeeding her child in a public place is immodest, you are a fool. That is the least immodest thing I've ever heard of. In fact, I think it's the most beautiful thing in the world, it's life being lived out right in front of us, the opportunity to see a new generation.
So, his entire thing was inspired by a blog post BB.com about Minnisha Lamba. Sure she's wearing a bikini in the photos, but it's for a summer issue of a magazine. I found myself almost disgusted that it was women who were calling her a slut and a whore, and that she had no respect for her family; and that she should be stoned to death for exposing herself so much. It was terrible. I was so disgusted by the sheer inhumanity. How dare they judge a girl they've never met and then go on to say that she deserves to die? So I just needed to vent.
Personally, I think the human body is beautiful in all it's forms, and that anyone who slanders anyone else is the one who is an "infidel".
P.S. If this sounds badly written, it's because I've been up for more than 20 hours. I'll have to go back and fix it another day.
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| Oh! Tough question especially since I'm so music crazy, but currently,
"Down" by Jay Sean ft Lil' Wayne.
Finally, a good looking Punjabi guy comes into the limelight with a really catchy track!
I just answered this Featured Question; you can answer it too! | | |
| If there is one place I'd love to live, work, eat, sleep, and play; it's here.
The local coffeehouse right smack dab in the middle of downtown. It's a small place, but it's one of the best I've ever been too. It's not part of a chain and it's completely local. Almost anytime I want to escape this is where I come. They have amazing coffee and some of best snacks to go along with them.
I think I was first introduced to this place back in 2004 by my best friend Kay. Kay is a coffee addict, and a bit of coffee snob too. She fell in love with the frozen coffees here, and I can immediately tell you why. They're the best. Especially their frozen turtles. Coffee with chocolate and caramel syrup, with whip cream. Just right amount of sweetness and coffee. Yum!
But in the last few years, especially as I've started to realize that my home sometimes isn't the haven I wish it was, this place has become my escape. I remember in my last year of high school, when I was so stressed with work and school, some mornings I'd just say "Fuck this" and just escape the world and come here. I'd sit in the one seat near the back, and just study with a cup of their amazing coffees.
This place is something like an oasis for me. I don't tell anyone, but when I can't take it, I come here. Mostly because I can sit and just read and relax for as long as I want and no one says a thing. I even wrote my entire 12 page research paper for my literature class in high school hanging out here.
I think my favorite thing about this place is the ambiance. It's like coffee, for lack of a better term. Smooth, warm, and very comforting. I love the acoustic music they lightly play. It's never the horrid crap from the radio and every one is always warm and inviting. I've been to coffeehouse where the servers are complete jacks, and it really ruins the mood. But here? Here they got it right.
So today, I'm studying for my nutrition class, along with a cup of white mocha (white chocolate and coffee) and a morning glory muffin (carrot cake). The muffin was a throw back to my childhood b/c it tasted exactly like my grandfather's favorite muffins. He used to buy them from a local bakery when I was little, and they were the best. It's been a while since I've had one, but the feeling was the same. And the coffee is not too sweet, the right mix of coffee and sweet. I like flavored coffees, I've never been a black coffee drinker, and I don't think I'd ever be one.
It's nice to just sit here and study for my exam tomorrow. I've got one more online lecture presentation to go through, since my professor is too lazy to really lecture us. After that, I just have to finish my objectives study guide. And with the acoustic music and warm coffee flowing, I think I'll be able to finish in time with ease, here in my private oasis.
So do you have a private oasis? | | |
| Firstly, biochemistry is kicking my ass. Like, beating it black and blue. Shit, I can't even begin to explain that one. I don't know how I'm gonna pass this class.
Anyway, now that I've gotten that out of my system. Let's get to the real entry.
College Woes.
I lived on campus last year. Well kind of. I lived in an apartment nearby. I shared it with a friend whom I had known from art classes back in high school. We're pretty good friends, we even worked together for about a year. I'd go to class, feel kind of awkward, especially since I was a first year, try to study, and just like everyone else, end up watching HBO instead. (Our apartment had free HBO, all of the HBO channels. Seriously. It was so awesome for the movies and so horrific for my grades all at the same time.) I'd try to go to library and study. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't. And there was my whole second semester and my--well, for lack of a better word, meltdown.
I've chosen to commute this year. Two reasons; one being that I don't have the money to live on campus since an apartment costs like 600 USD a month and college housing is way more. Second is that--well, I like being at home. I like being with my family. Even though we're going through some really tough times, I like being at home and being able to drink tea with my mom, watch the news with my dad, and beat my brother in UT 3.
But one thing that's struck me is that I don't know how to connect to people. I'm horrendously shy.
I know. It sounds strange. But I can't bring myself to talk to other people in my classes. Truthfully, it scares the ever loving shit out of me. I have to actively beat myself into it. And even then, I feel awkward and that I'm embarrassing the flying fuck out of myself.
I guess my woe is that while everyone else I know is making these connections and getting to know people, I feel like I'm on outside looking in. I don't know how to connect with people and it gets a little lonely. I almost get angry with myself for it, but then, I feel helpless because whenever I speak to someone in my classes, I feel like a fool.
I sometimes think the biggest reason is that I walked into college with a shit ton of credits and started taking 300 level classes in my first year. So while everyone else in my classes has been there for a while, I was a newbie and I still feel like that. I almost envy true "freshmen" because of that. Because they can come in as lost sheep and are forgiven and easily accepted. But I feel lost and unable to connect.
Sometimes I even get mad at myself for not going to the parties, for not going out and being stupid with everyone, because maybe then at least, I'd feel like I was a part of the crowd. I know some people live to escape the mob, but being on the outside isn't always that glamorous either. And I'm tried of being lonely.
So how do I change this?
Do I go to the parties? Do I go to random club meetings and try to fit in? Do I suck it up and ignore it? Or do I do the most frightening thing ever and go up to someone and say "Hi, my name is... I think we have biochemistry together. How'd you do on that last test? It totally kicked my ass."?
I guess the only way to find out is to try it out. One method at a time. I already know that ignoring it won't work, because it does make me sad that I don't connect with people. So I'm guess I'm going to have to put myself out there. Fuck, can I get some liquid courage before I go out there?
So then, my woe is that I can't connect and it makes me feel lonely. Now I have to find the courage to overcome it.
Wish me luck, I think.
P.S. Sorry about the cursing, but I guess I'm still a little upset over my biochemistry exam results. I did put a caution rating though. So hopefully, no one will be too off-put by it. | | |
| Do you remember the days when Saturday morning cartoons used to mean shows like Batman, Transformers, Spiderman, Justice League, and X-men?
Do you remember the days when a cool vampire used to mean Blade? A hot vampire meant Angel or Spike?
Do you remember the days when every little girl wanted to be cool and scream "Girl Power"? or be like Serena Williams and rock the court?
Do you remember the days when every little boy wanted to be like Michael Jordan?
Do you remember when Barbie wasn't a fashionista? When Barbie was a doctor, a teacher, a nurse, an ice skater, a gymnast?
Do you remember when every little boy just wanted the newest biggest Super Soaker?
Damn, I miss those days.
Those days when being a little kid meant actually getting play, pretend, imagine, and explore. Frankly, the 90s were an amazing decade for kids. Coolest cartoons, best toys, and when after school meant playing outside.
I'm glad I was a kid in the 90s because I got to have so much fun. More often that not, I spent my afternoons playing outside with my friends; playing hopscotch, soccer, tag, hide-and-go-seek; or watching and cheering my brother and his friends playing HORSE or 21 on our basketball net. I remember playing in my neighbors' backyard or in my friend's front yard. I remember knowing the name of every single kid who lived on my street. I remember getting really tanned in the summer, and then slowly evening out in the winters. More importantly, I remember being able to use my imagination and go anywhere I wanted. Being a kid meant I got to play, dirty my knees, scrape my hands, and run like wild through the streets of my neighborhood.
Now, I don't see kids in my neighborhood playing. It makes me sad, especially when I know that the median age of kids in my neighborhood is like 6. They should be playing outside all the time, especially in the breezy afternoons, but instead, the streets are empty and I don't even know my neighbors because we don't ever see each other.
Damn I miss those days.
Even now, when I babysat, I'd let the kids see one hour of TV, but mostly we played outside. And it used to horrify me that we were the only ones out there. I'd have the kids out drawing with side walk chalk or riding their bikes, or in the backyard, playing badminton or swinging on the swing set. We'd spend hours outside, only to come in when the sun was too high in the sky or to eat and drink. And we were the only ones on the street. How sad is that?
Today, I go jogging in my neighborhood in the early mornings. People don't recognize me, even though I've lived there for 6 years. How sad is that?
But the saddest part is that we don't even know how to go back. Back to the good old days.
Damn, that's sad.
P.S. Sorry about how melancholy this got. Really, I only wanted to rant about bad TV. Opps!
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